EMotions
Life is a journey of emotions. I am trying to capture as many as I can feel and find.
I'm compiling a list of feelings that we find difficult to describe in the hopes of reassuring you that you're not alone in experiencing them.
SHY
That moment when we try being camera ready as soon as we see a camera pointed at us out of nowhere.
At that very moment we are hesitant to do it in the first call. But when the photographer persists, we get this tinge of curiosity to look at our picture. This curiosity keeps increasing from setting our hair and dress till he puts his finger on the shutter button and finally makes us anxious. Questions are stuck in the head about what is happening on the other side.
Do I have to smile? Maybe. Do I look fine? Maybe. Amongst so many emotions inside our head, little do we realize, all these are overlapped by one bigger emotion – Shyness. Shy to smile. Shy to pose. Focusing on these questions we forget that we already have a straight face looking right into the camera with a straight and stiff posture.
Have you felt these questions in your head too? Have you caught yourself being shy?
- Dinesh and Mounika
CHILD IN YOU
Child at heart? Well, we all are still children at heart. It depends on you, how much you expose the inner child to the outer world. A company of a child is always enjoyed no matter how much of an intellect or mature one might be. There's nothing wrong in being a child. Nurture the child within. I feel one should express like a child and think like a child since children have the purest and simplest emotions. And being adults all we seek to do is to simplify things.
- Dinesh and Mounika
TOXIC
Addiction, the bad kind. The one we love to indulge. The one we build with people. You just love them, love being with them. The amount of satisfaction is immense, the happiness is unaccountable, you love being around them. But then, there is void. A feeling that something is pulling you back but you still persist.
The kind of addiction lot similar to that of a cigarette. The kind of addiction where we smoke just to feel the kick of it knowing we have signed up for something which is going to make an irreparable loss in the long run. Yet we continue doing it. We continue spoiling ourselves. You love the intimacy, but lack the special bond of “the one and only”. They are everything you’d wish for, but deep down you know it’s not what you receive.
You are stuck in reciprocating but you never see yourself receiving. Neither can deny intimacy nor can stop getting hurt. Constant battle between your heart and your head. The toxicity keeps haunting but you never choose to listen to your head. Probably that’s what where you are stuck. It’s not always right to listen to your heart.
- Dinesh and Mounika
THE GIRL WHO LET MY HEART WIN
It was Six in the morning
Was stretching on my balcony rails when I saw her
Amidst the foggy air
Sitting on the stairs
Her posture had so much grace
I bent from all the corners of the balcony space
Just to see a glimpse of her face.
My heart wanted to relish
This feeling of anticipation
My mind wanted to cherish
The feeling of satisfaction.
To this conflicting feel
I made a deal
Requested my mind to not be a dunce
And to let heart win atleast once.
- Dinesh
BLEND
Ever felt that you can be more than what you are? I did. More than what others think probably even more than the little I think of myself too. Ever thought of targets? Oh, I can do them easily. I can do this and I’ve got this. But then there is this thought of expectation. I am expected to behave the way society wants me to behave. The image of me is firmed. Which is not true. Is it too late to change this now? Is it too late to break the image forced on me? Heart says to burst the cloud of expectation and shower my talent, is it okay to do so?
Will things change if I do so? Will the relationships stay the same? Will the bonds break?
Am I allowed to this? Is this thought even right? Am I answerable to someone? Why am I so clueless?
Why is society so important? Should I blame the society or should I blame myself? Will society accept me? Isn’t this my life? Am I not supposed to do what i am capable of? How do I do this? So many questions right out of nowhere, not sure whom to ask or where I’d find the answers.
I HATE THIS. :”)
- Dinesh and Mounika
EVOLUTION
Life is short. Life is fast. Just yesterday we remember going to a school trip with our friends to watch what our elders have left behind. Today we are those elders trying to leave behind something for our future generations.The aim is to create a world after death. If you don't have anything to leave behind, the universe has planned something for that. Wondering how? You regrow into a tree, and the next bunch of kids visit you on their school trip. Maybe they'll leave something or maybe even they'll become trees. The cycle continues. :")
Do you plan on leaving anything behind or do you plan on becoming a fellow tree? No regrets :')
- Dinesh and Mounika
CREATIVE BLOCK
The last time, you remember creating some amazing content. You imagined something or you felt something and you created something from it. Your work is appreciated by many and they expect to see more of amazing stuff from you. But then you try creating something, but you fail to create something that amazing.
You are not able to imagine or you are not able to brainstorm any new ideas. You are passionate to create something but you just can’t think of anything. You feel you are even using two heads to get some productive result but to no avail. You write, but you aren’t satisfied. It’s mind draining, and lot more taxing but you end up being stuck at the same point. Even if you do get something in your head you just scratch it off.
The situation where there are ocean of ideas but no sense of direction? Ever caught up in the maze of where to start or what to start with? Ever felt that creative block?
- Dinesh and Mounika
OVERTHINKING
Did this ever happen to you that you are staring at something but you are not actually looking at it? Probably you are dreaming about your lunch or maybe you are just thinking. Thinking about how to do something you’d really want to do. Thinking about the what-ifs and whys by creating some possible and impossible scenarios in your head.
In this process of thinking and losing your mind on it, did you ever notice spiraling down into negative thought patterns? Did you ever observe that suddenly for no reason at all you start cringing about your past mistakes, you worry about present issues-connect the past and present and convince yourself that future is going to be worse? You over analyze your experiences, you inflate every thought and get lost in the thoughts of things that aren't actually there. In all this chaos you get to the point where you completely forget why you even started thinking first of all. Now, here’s a thought which you got to focus on.
If at this point you stop, you can find the difference between how beautiful your mind was when you decided to do a task you wanted to do and how chaotic it has become just thinking about useless and non-existent consequences. The difference between how your mind became a dumping yard for your garbage thoughts instead of developing some beautiful ideas. Yes. You. You should stop thinking and start doing. The moment you question yourself 'what if' that is the trigger for you to stop thinking and immediately move your body and start working.
- Dinesh and Mounika
TWO
The vehemence of letting it go and holding onto it at the same time. I want to explore, follow my passion. No, I don't want to lose my current comfort and stability. I don't want to disrupt my routine. Is it always this confusing? The feeling of traversing into something new, something you love whilst enjoying this stability. The constant battle between comfort over the fear of trying something new. The road towards passion is not always easy. Does it mean we ought to give up on it? The sense of stability in the place you are overshadows your love towards passion. It’s on us to take the road not taken. To discover the beauty after the rough path.
-Dinesh and Mounika